Charity

I always tell myself that I'm going to keep up with this, I think I need to start marking my calendar to blog every Sunday or something.

These last few weeks have been a blur, it's busy season at work and needless to say I'm exhausted. Working 10-15 hrs of overtime a week will do that to you I guess... But you know what, every time I feel like complaining, reality always swoops in reminding me just how blessed I am. 

I was on a mission to find a charity for the month of July that did something amazing for veterans, that I could present to our committee and really make a difference... I did some digging and found this amazing organization called the WNY Veterans Housing Coalition. Founded over 25 years ago, the VHC has helped over 15,000 homeless veterans in WNY get their benefits, get jobs, find housing and health care. 

After meeting with the operations manager, getting a tour and listening to Celia tell me why it is so important to her to do what she does... I fell in Love, and when she hugged me after our meeting and told me it was fate, I cried. Celia had been hoping someone like me would come her way, but the truth is I'd been looking for someone like her, for a group like hers. 

I honestly like my job, I love my coworkers and I make a decent living... But being on the charity committee, being able to actually make a difference, to see real results, that is what makes me feel alive. All my life I've grown up around charity, and I've always felt a calling to helping people... It's just so hard to make a living at the same time, working for United has allowed me to do both in the most beautiful way, for that I am so grateful. 

We are pulling out all the stops for this group in July and I am so excited... I'm apologizing ahead of time for all the social media blasts in the near future asking you to clean our your closets and pantries if you're so inclined. Our brave men and women deserve the world for what they are willing to give up for you and I. The horrifying statistic that so many of them find themselves homeless, without a job, proper clothing or even just a friend is heart breaking... 

I have the greatest friends in the world, and although I don't get to see them as much as I like... I'm so very grateful. I have a home, I have a good job, I am healthy, and I have Love. Getting a tour of a homeless shelter, hearing how the operations manager is someone's next of kin, makes any complaint I had about the weather or traffic just seem ridiculous. 

There is always something to be grateful for... Please don't forget that. 

Gun Control in NYS

I love a good political debate, it's interesting to hear other arguments and opinions. Its what makes this country great. However, I don't tolerate people who take it way too far... Look we get it, you're afraid of losing your guns. That is no reason for the insane comments about the President being just like hitler, the antichrist, or a Muslim with a secret agenda. Clinton passed the same law that expired during the Bush Administration. Would you still feel this way if he were white? If his name was not Barack Obama? Grow up.

Look I don't agree with the administration on a lot of things... Im furious about my taxes going up! But I can't stand when people go off the deep end with racist and frankly bigoted comments. Barack Obama is the Commander and Chief and whether you like him or not, whether you voted for him or not, that office deserves respect.

We can debate the 2nd amendment until we're all blue in the face... This is NY State legislators making this a law, not the President.

I am pro gun... I grew up around them, around hunters and I learned to use them myself. I like having them safely in my home, and going to a gun range to shoot targets. I see nothing wrong with responsible gun owners having rifles to hunt and handguns for protections. I'm sorry but you don't need machine guns... Anything you can't legally hunt with is stupid. There is no reason for you having that kind of weapon.

The laws are trying to make it harder for weapons to end up in the wrong hands... Do you honestly disagree with this? Every gun should be registered, every sale should be documented with a back ground check. Everyone I know who got their pistol in NY knows what a process that is, it should be just like that for anything else.

You need to put yourself in the shoes of the victims of mass shootings, think about if something like that happened in your town, to your children... How would you feel about everyone having MILITARY weapons just for fun? Those are war machines and exactly where they belong is at war...

I'd love to hear the arguments for why you need a machine gun, but I won't tolerate bigoted comments.

Ready... Go!

New Years Resolutions...

I always have the same... Workout more, save more, write more. This year started off pretty rough, but as time went on everything changed. I began to change.

What I thought was the end, was only the beginning of something much more. That's what this year has been, the year of more. More happiness, more love, more time, more hope, more faith, more family, more every thing that's good and right.

Usually people can't wait for the new year, hoping this year will be better than the last... But 2012 was very good to me, I am so lucky and grateful for this life.

I look forward to kissing my sweetie at midnight, and enjoying another year of more. Cheers. XoXo

Grateful

Last night was my Dads family Christmas Party... As I walked inside, I was overwhelmed with one feeling, gratefulness. Another year where we all got to gather together around the Christmas tree, have a great night of laughter, food and of course some serious RLC. Joking about what time did we think my Dad & Step mom (who are always late) would get there? Which ended up being only 20 minutes late. When I saw my sister walk in I just ran to her, she had all these gifts in her hand and I didn't even let her put them down first. We hugged for a few minutes and I just kept kissing her head... How lucky we are to live this life.

My boyfriend and I sat down on the couch as everyone began to tell stories about their day, their jobs, etc... And I caught myself just hugging him and kissing his cheek over and over, eventually he looked over at me and asked if I was alright? Lol I'm more than alright, I'm just so happy you're here. That our family got to laugh and smile last night while there are so many families are grieving this holiday season for what they've lost. The time will come when politics and laws need to be fought over, but this weekend was a time to grieve, to hold your loved ones close and to be grateful for the life you have, for those around you.

I like to think that I don't take this life for granted, that I tell the people I love that I love them, that I try to be a giving person who helps others, that I always remember there is someone who has it far worse than I could ever imagine. But when things like this happen, you just feel like you don't appreciate it enough... Nothing like a tragedy to remind us all that we need to make every day count. 

My thoughts and prayers are with those families and the Newtown community tonight... No one should ever go through what you've had to endure. I know the news is hard to watch, but it is important to know their stories, and to honor their memories. If you're so inclined to help out, then reach out to organizations who are trying to provide support and comfort in this time of need. Or just pay it forward for this life you have, pay for a strangers coffee, hold the door for someone, say thank you, and most importantly... Say I love you.

Unbelievable

Today as most of you already know, a mass shooting happened at an elementary school in Connecticut... And as of now the loss is 18 children, and 9 adults. My heart aches for those families, and especially for the parents, sending your children off to school so that they can do bigger and better things with their lives. And in one moment a very sick and twisted person has flipped your entire life upside down. I am so incredibly sorry.

My 14 year old sister tells me all the time I'm too paranoid, that I'm too protective... I don't want her at the mall by herself, at a concert, jogging around the block. She laughs at my fears and tells me to "relax" but she is the love of my life and I can't imagine what would happen if I lost her... This overwhelming feeling that no matter what you do, no matter how careful you are, anyone at anytime could just decide to take yours or the lives of someone you love... It's unbelievable. This fear, how do you handle the fear?

You know in California I used to worry that someone would "dognap" my Husky lol, I was told it happened a lot out there and it really made me anxious... Cut to both my dogs having real time GPS locaters on them that I can track via my smart phone. Yes, I will most likely be the parent who puts a "leash" on my child in public. And although my dogs are my world I can't imagine the fear that a parent must feel for their life's blood, the anxiety. It makes me terrified for the generations to come, wishing we could put our loved ones and children in a bubble to protect them from all the evil in the world, when we know we cant. Days like today remind you to be grateful, to not take a single day for granted, to tell the people you love, that you love them every day.

I know that tomorrow life will go on and eventually begin again... People say that the only way to stop the fear is by living. I know that if I never flew on a plane again, went to a movie theater, a shopping mall, I'd be letting them win. You find out who you are in times like these, you remember what matters most in your life and what doesn't. Please hug your children tonight, your family & your loved ones. We are very lucky to be safe in our own homes tonight, and our thoughts and prayers are with all those affected by this despicable act of violence.




"...There's one thing we can never be prepared for, and that's the fear. How do we handle the fear? My son Lucas once asked me if the 'bad guys' were going to blow us up. How do you answer that? How do you explain terrorism to your kid? How do you explain that at any time, any place, someone could just decide to take us all out? And that's why terrorism works, because we can't explain it, we can't predict it, it can happen anytime, anywhere, by anyone. So, all we can do is trust that law enforcement has our backs, and then we let it go. Because the only way to stop the fear is by living. Just living, being with your family, your friends, your community. Look, there is nothing we can do about it - except to seize the day. We live while we can, laugh while we can, love while we can. And that, my friends, is how we beat terrorism..." Pamela (Army Wives)

Time to re-vamp

"Did you say it? I love you. I don't ever wanna live without you. You changed my life. Did you say it? Make a plan. Set a goal. Work toward it. But every now and then look around. Drink it in. 'Cause this is it. It might all be gone tomorrow." Grey's Anatomy


I remembered that I was going to try and at least post once a week and I didn't. Partly because I have been pretty busy and mostly because I was disappointed/frustrated with this entire plan... Working out has actually went pretty well, more consisting of walking my dogs nearly every day and working out when I can, I am eating better and taking more vitamins. But prayer is still strained at best. I am not someone who likes to be fake, or pretend to be someone I'm not. Do I wish I had some great faith and understanding of God and his plan for me? Sure... But will I go about pretending that I do and not saying how I feel and not questioning the reasons why? No.
I think putting a 40 day goal was a joke, because everyday my relationship with God goes up and down. My feelings are conditional for what is suppose to be an unconditional love. I believe that bad things just happen, without reason or meaning and to try and find the master plan in all of it is just trying to find the silver lining... 40 days was too soon, it wasn't going to change in 40 days, maybe not this year, who knows, I could be angry with God for one thing or another for the rest of my life. But that's not the christian thing to say, yet I know that I am not the only one who feels this way! And I know people are just trying to help when they attempt to comfort you with their faith, but quoting scripture and trying to explain God's plan to someone who feels the way that I do... You might as well be speaking Arabic.

I believe that where there are storm clouds, there's thunderstorms, and where there are thunderstorms, there's lightning. Do I believe that miracles happen? Of course I do, but do I think there is any method or reasoning behind it? No... Because everyone who is suffering from Cancer, deserves to live. But not everyone does. Every loving person who wants to raise a child and would be a great parent, should have the chance to. But not everyone does. We are currently involved in two Wars, while another always seems on the horizon... It is easy to be positive and have Faith when you live in the light. It is much harder, when the world seems to darken every day.

We celebrate small victories, good health if we have it, family when they're near, and a love that only comes around once in a lifetime. I go to bed every night praying for the world, even though logic & reason tell me it won't make a difference. Maybe one morning I will wake up and feel different, but for tonight, and tomorrow, I remain a realist.

So this blog is going to change, and I am going to try and write a lot more and it will never be the same subject... I can't promise it will be every day, or even every week... But whenever something inspires me to do so, I will.

Peace & Love